Seperation Anxiety

Since I was a baby I’ve had seperation anxiety. When my mom was in basic training, I was about 3 years old. According to either my dad or grandma, not sure which one, I wouldn’t not eat while my mom was away. I’d just cry a lot.

I would never stay the night at a friends house before the age of 10 or 11. I had a friend that lived about a block away, and I wouldn’t even stay at her house over night.

Now, nearly 7 years later, its still a thing for me. The “break” my “not boyfriend” and I are taking is tearing me apart. I didn’t realize it was seperation anxiety til about a day ago. I ate my first “real meal” in 3 days last night. Before that I’d eat a few chips, go in my room and cry. Now we’re on day 4 of this “break” and all I want to do is cry. Im eating again, thankfully, but now I dont want to sleep.

Any time I think of you, I start to shake. My hands start shaking and then the rest of my body. If only I’d realized it sooner. If only you knew.

I’m not even excited about my birthday being 10 days away. I only want you.

I’m “too dependent on you”
Well wouldn’t you be dependent on the only person who can make you smile when you’re upset. The person who gives you reason to live. The person you should be thanking for not letting you kill yourself. I’m not seeing myself as “dependent” but more “thankful”.

Yesterday looked how I felt. How ironic

Yesterday looked how I felt. How ironic

I’m trying. I really am

When you meet someone who tries their hardest to stick by you regardless of how difficult you are, keep them. Keep them at all costs because finding someone who cares enough to look past your flaws isn’t something that happens every day.

Midnight Thoughts (I got lucky with you)

supergirlneversleeps this is you babe! I love you!

(via b-ridiculous-627)

If only he knew

(Source: reality-escape-artist)

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